24 January 2008


That's my weak attempt at the cyber finger.

Hadn't heard from the pharmacy all week so I called today. Gave them my usual information, then "Can I put you on hold?" Oh hell. A minute later, they tell me something that they should have told me earlier in the week. Evidently, with specialty drugs, the insurance companies use one specialty pharmacy. My new insurance company isn't compatible with the old pharmacy. Talk about a cluster/SNAFU/FUBAR. It is just unbelievable to me that I had to call to find this information out and then run around with my hair on fire.

After I got off the phone with the old pharmacy, made a call to new insurance company. One phone call got redirected into another one. "Sure we can help you." I had to get pre-registered with the pharmacy, told to expect a phone call in the next 48 hours to fully register, in the meantime, call your doctor and get them to fax the script in.

Enter Act II for the drama of the day . . . the over worried/over protective parents who have asked every day this week if I've heard from the pharmacy never heard a word I said last week. "Your drugs didn't show up today." Which was totally contrary to what I said last week: "Call Thursday if you don't hear from us." Explained what happened, kept getting more and more angry with every question. All of a sudden I'm being defensive and I'm a liar. I lost it.

The blow up that was gradually building up since all of this started finally boiled over. The thing that separates my friends from my parents is that my friends don't treat me any differently than before. My parents treat me like I'm soda glass and the littlest thing will break me. If I sneeze it creates havoc. I don't want people to ask how I'm doing, I'll tell you. You want to ask about MS, I'll tell you. You wanna know how I'm dealing with MS . . . couldn't tell you. Aside from the myelitis, that's the closest I've come to any similar symptoms.

There is a man at work that is in a wheelchair from MS. He's had it for 15 years. Gradually started out like everyone else, I imagine. I've only known him for about 4 years. He used to walk with a cane. On his bad days he had a wheelchair. Gradually he became worse and worse. I would have to help him out of his car because he wasn't strong enough to push his upper body up. On his bad days, myself and another person would have to cradle lift him up into a chair. He tired out easily and his muscle endurance was next to nothing.

I look at him and I am so far from where he is now or even where he was when I first knew him. I can't even compare.

After today, I just want to give the world the finger.

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